“I Hear Yes,” Poetry by Vera West

i hear “yes”

I jokingly have asked my husband: “Do you feel like I’m a gallon of milk you got home only to find out it’s expired?” He knows I’m referring to how I used to be pretty but now feel curdled. He laughs—not a real laugh but a confused nervous one I’ve forced out of him by knowing he loves me and asking him a ridiculous question like that anyway. You might focus on the fact that he did in fact laugh—coerced or not—but what you should really be focusing on is how only a sad insecure person hiding behind pain in humor would make that joke in the first place. It says so much and for the record, he always answers no but I always hear yes.

**

affect and effect 

No one warns you 

that in order to make it out, 

you’ll be consumed by the shit storm; 

the rain dries, 

the clouds clear, 

but you’re still running, 

still desperately cutting  

through the dense foliage,  

those poisonous circumstances 

hindering your path. 

It’s been so hard, for so long, 

you don’t recognize Peace; 

Chaos has saturated you 

until it’s all you feel 

and any other sensation  

must be a malicious trick. 

But then, 

suddenly it all stops; 

opportunities surround you, 

and you realize  

all the joys you’ve been chasing 

you’ve already caught 

and you realize 

you’ve not only made it out, 

you’ve thrived. 

**

the dead us 

We  

don’t just  

grieve for the  

dead dear to us, 

we grieve for the dead us; 

that innocence shed to survive,  

and once on the other side 

we suddenly feel everything 

we couldn’t bear 

to feel 

before. 

Before, 

to feel 

we couldn’t bear. 

we suddenly feel everything 

and once on the other side, 

that innocent shed to survive, 

we grieve the dead us; 

dead dear to us,  

we don’t just grieve. 

***